The night at panwali turned out to be quite eventful. We
shared the hut with 15 other garhwalis who were Maamaji’s friends. The night
was filled with bhajans and occasional dancing. That was till a few fiery and
hungry Delhites gate crashed into the party. They had a lot of trouble reaching
panwali and were overwhelmed with hunger and cold. The Shepard told him that he
does not have any more blankets to give them. That’s when an over-zealous man
in that lot said he will pay double of what the garhwalis were paying. That
started it. All the men who were dancing to devotional numbers charged at the
delhites for their unwarranted show of moneyed arrogance. A melee ensued and
once it was over (the folks from delhi
were hounded out of the hut) the discussion became very political. Talk of
‘outsiders’ exploiting the sons of the soil…Taking the daily morning bath in
panwali was a prospect I dreaded the entire night. But even that did not
prepare me for the coldness the next morning. Brr…After the bath, I started
walking probably a little too fast just to keep my body warmed up. The next few
hours were spent in crossing some of the most scenic spots in Himalayas
that I have seen till now. The next 10 kms was filled with quite a unique
terrain. It was mostly meadow land but what was breathtaking was we were
literally walking on the ridge with downward sloping meadows on either side of
the footpath. Undulating meadows on both sides as we walked from one peak of a
mountain to the next. It was breathtaking both literally and figuratively. Afterwards
just when I was about to burst after imbibing too much of the beauty, the
descent started and we reached Triyug Narayanan. There was a Vishnu temple and
this is supposed to be the place where Shiva and Parvati got married. Inside
the temple a perpetual fire is maintained as a tradition and all the trekkers
were supposed to pick firewood on the way to the town to offer to the perpetual
fire. Night was spent in a small hotel. Triyug Narayanan was the first town in
Rudraprayag district.
I was dropping off S for one of her meetings. The conversation meandered into how some of our volunteer friends were talking about me leaving IYC. S was observing that we would have never got married if I was not a Isha teacher at that time. She also observed how my deciding to move to Blore was kind of thrust upon her. It was a fair observation yet painful for me to hear it. At some point, I felt the need to justify/explain/clarify that i am a seeker. Still a seeker. After I said it, I felt a moment of pause within me. Am I a seeker? I felt embarrassed that I have to claim me being a seeker in so many words. Am I really a seeker? What does being a seeker mean? Does it mean that I should be living in an ashram? Does it mean that I need to work 100% and more towards a larger-than-life goal? Does it mean that I am checking out of "Hotel California" ? i.e. I am done with the world and ready for something else? Does it mean to live a constant affirmation that I may not know every...
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