Ananth's Blog

Beach at Fecamp - Claude Monet I should learn to remember that this is the moment. This is the time of our lives. That I am at the right time at the right place with the right Man. I remind myself that whatever I have is not forever. It’s so good that I am sure it’s not forever. I tell myself that I should never take this for granted. No matter what craziness happens at work. Sometimes the reminder comes by just looking at the Sadhanapada volunteer who has an urgency that can only come with a ticking clock. For them, the ticking clock is in the form of the end of the southern run of the sun or what is traditionally referred as “Dakshinayana”. That’s when the Sadhanapada volunteers go back to their software or investment banking careers after 6 months of volunteering in the Isha yoga center. When moment-to-moment awareness of the preciousness of this moment is not tenable, any artificial device to remind oneself is fair play. The time of the Sun’s southern run is a time...

This is embarrassing, my honeybunch... I know it will be for you as well... What's this absurdity in missing you??? Sometimes I miss you and it hurts so much.... And then I remember that you are alive.. And with me... And I am alive.. And we have each other... !!! What panacea for the pangs of the poor puerile heart? Panacea nay.... Placebo would be just fine... Or perhaps another chance to say "I love you"...??? When what I should be really saying is "I devour you". 💏 Post inspired by

Have you ever wondered why we gravitate towards certain situations and certain kinds of people? Why we instinctively trust and commit to a certain individual? I have wondered that. A lot. The last few weeks, I have been thinking about Maamaji. I spent a lot of my time in the Himalayas with him. I was specifically wondering what made me choose him? Me and him – We were an eclectic duo. We come from two different worlds. He was an ageing Hindu pandit in a remote north Indian village. I was a catholic from South India with a fatal obsession for Yoga/Sadhguru. There were so many aspects of Maamaji’s personality that weighed uncomfortably on my then new-age-spirituality sensibilities. For eg, Maamaji personally rolls his tobacco and smokes them unapologetically after performing some Pooja in the nearby Uttarkashi temple. He charges money for performing these poojas promising that “Bhole Baba will help you pass the exam” etc. He gets angry quickly. Sometimes for arbitrary reaso...

"Woman with cat" - Pablo Picasso It feels like fall, though it is prime summer. Should have been the time for feverish activity and unrelenting purpose For I know that this is the last stretch No time for sentimental retch But there is this nagging feeling again… “Purpose is pointless. Motivation is madness.” When the sky is vast, the breeze is unbridled and the oceans wild, This daily routine is a damnation There is a kitten in my backyard He looks at me with his damaged eye His loveliness makes me cry I want to caress and hold him nigh.. But even before I do that, I know it is not enough… For it is not just cuteness… It is a dare to dissolve Oh! The bluntness… It’s been a while since I let a feline friend move me to tears All I want is to flop back to earth And take the maternal embrace of the dirt I want to let the borders of my body dissolve into the top soil I should remember to relax I should remember that I ha...

He is a lovely kitten. He is very young, a mere baby. He keeps his eyes closed all the time. And he is out there. From my couch in the living room, I just see a mound of fluff in the middle of my backyard. He curls into his own body. Intermittently his body shudders in the morning cold. I feel a motherly pang within me. I worry: why does he venture out to the open? Why can’t he stay cozy under the bush like his siblings? He seems to remind me of what is to be done. It seems easy in retrospect to venture unprotected into the cold for the first time. Does it become easier the second time around? I suddenly become aware of the many things. Like the passing time. Last week, someone suddenly mentions my age. I am also becoming aware of the structures that I have created for myself. Coming from a space of no framework or organization, I was scared that I could not become a proverbial cog in the wheel. And revolting as it sounds, I wanted to be the cog. And I loved the wheel. I ...

"நகரும் நொடிகள் கசையடி போலே முடிகினின் மேலே விழிவதினலே வரி வரி கவிதை" -Thamari - "Thalli Pogathey" from the movie "Achcham Yenbadhu Madamaiada" Image credits: "Window seat" by Bob Rey Just a few more days this wait Set for myself this bait Waiting not just for you But for a life more inebriate PS: The above-mentioned Tamil verse means something to the effect of : Every moving second feels like a whip on my back, the scars of which forms lines of a poem.

तुझे चाहूँ जैसा है तू मुझे तेरी बारिश में भीगना है, घुल जाना तुझे चाहूँ जैसा है तू मुझे तेरी लपट में जलना राख हो जाना Prasoon Joshi “Rehna Tu” - Delhi 6 Thus spake the poet Prasoon Joshi Don't know what's his story Don't know yet: Who was haunting him? Who was his muse? The Demon or the Deacon Dreary? But... Crushed I was by his words' glory Reminded I was of your sweet gentle memory Can’t believe I am missing you so much. I love you so very much that I am hating myself... PS: Meaning of the above hindi lyrics: I like you, just the way you are I want to drench myself in your rain and get dissolved in it.. I like you, just the way you are I want to get burnt in your flame, and burn away to ashes..